2月5日
F*** Fear
Okay, that is it I’ve had it. I just can’t take any more. I can’t take one more news story of a major corporation cutting thousands of jobs. One more news story about the sales of Spam and Campbell Soup going up while the sales of Chevys and Barbie dolls plummet. One more story about corporate greed or hedge funds and hucksters that have cost countless folks their retirement and college funds. I’m tired of being afraid to look at my own 401(k).
I’m tired of worrying about what might come and tired of hearing it is my fault as a consumer. Slap me for spending beyond my means, and slap me for not saving enough, then slap me again for saving and not spending. My shelves are stocked with soup and I don’t even really like soup. I’ve cut back on my spending. I’ve made the list of extras I’d have to cancel if it comes to that—cable, subscriptions, etc. I’ve started clipping coupons and looking for sales. I’ve calculated how many months I would be able to pay my mortgage based on my savings. I’ve weighed the possibilities of bartering out my husband’s auto and handyman experience. I can have him fix your transmission for a basket of eggs.
I’m tired of worrying whether my work is visible enough to management after ten years of building high quality products that have brought in millions of revenue and satisfied customers. I’m already doing the job of several people. I’ve always looked out for your best interest and done my best to keep costs down. I cannot take on one more project though and do anything well. Seriously, if you haven’t figured out by now that I’m a company asset then there is no hope for you. I worry for my colleagues and acquaintances who have already lost jobs and feel helpless that I have no contacts to give them—all people I wouldn’t hesitate to work with again or recommend.
I’m tired of trying to figure out if it is better for us to stimulate the economy with my tax money or let it ride and see what happens. I want to shake my representatives and congressmen and ask them, “What is wrong with you?” I want to throw a shoe at Bush. I want to march the bankers and hedge fund managers down Wall Street and throw tomatoes at them. I’m glad that corporation didn’t buy that corporate jet, but then I worry about the airline mechanic that lost his job and if no lavish parties occur in Vegas how will the black jack dealer pay her rent?
I’m tired of coming home exhausted and worn out and snapping at my family and I’m tired of being snapped at by my family from their own worries and stress. I’m tired of not having the energy to give my mother full attention when she calls. I miss my friends and yet don’t have the energy to call and am too worried about the future to make vacation plans to see them. I want to go drinking.
Does any of this resonate with you? This is a horrible terrible tailspin we are all in of worry and fear feeding on itself. What if we all went in tomorrow and said “F*** Fear!” What are you doing about it? Share it with me. Stimulate me and give me your ideas on how you plan to pull yourself out of this funk.